Wednesday, September 23, 2009

When It Rains, It Pours

This week has been kinda crazy. It started on Sunday night with Matthew having a fever. We were hoping he wasn't getting sick but of course he did. I took him to the doctor yesterday and he was diagnosed with hand, foot and mouth disease. I was really surprised that he had it again because I had heard that once a child gets it, they cannot get it again. I asked the doctor about it and she said that there's always a different strand going around so that's probably why he got it again. The kicker? There's nothing they can give to him to help make him better. It has to run it's course so we've had a couple of rough nights around here. He has sores in his mouth that are really bothering him and every time he swallows, it hurts. He is acting better today so I'm hoping that it's finally clearing up. He hasn't been to daycare yet this week. I'm hoping he'll be able to go back on Friday.

The other event going on in our house is that I've been diagnosed with Premature Ovarian Failure. When I visited my primary OB last month, she had some blood work done which came back with not so good results so she sent me to the fertility specialist. So yesterday he informed me that my ovaries have stopped functioning and I have a very slim chance of getting pregnant again. Talk about a low blow. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. How is this fair? First we lose our son and now I probably can't have anymore babies? It's so hard to comprehend this. It just doesn't make any sense. They don't have a reason for why this has happened. I have to get more blood work done (oh joy!) to find out the cause. This is something that cannot be fixed but they can at least find out the cause of it. Either way it sucks and it's very devastating to say the least. But at the same time I'm trying to keep a positive outlook about it. There is still a slim chance that I can get pregnant so I'm holding out hope but at the same time I don't want to drive myself crazy every month. It's going to a constant battle to remain calm and collected about the whole matter. Why does it have to be this difficult? I envy the people that don't have any problems, they don't know how lucky they really are.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Anniversary and a Camping Trip

Last Friday, Aug 28th, Steve and I celebrated our 5th wedding anniversary. I cannot believe it's been 5 years ago since I married my best friend. Never in a million years would I have guessed that we would have went through the horrible tragedy of losing our child. But we've remained strong and determined that we weren't going to let this break us. I read in a book right after we lost Andrew that the divorce rate jumps up to 80% when a couple loses a child. Wow, how is that for odds?? We've had hard days, I won't even begin to act like we haven't but we're getting through and I know in the end, it will make us stronger.

Also on Friday, we drove to Erie, PA for a long weekend of camping along with both sets of grandparents. We had a really good time despite the rain. Steve took some awesome pictures that I can hopefully put on here when he sends them to me (hint, hint). We did a lot of eating and talking, playing cards and making campfires. It was so nice to just get away.

So I started Weight Watchers yesterday. I'm on a mission to lose 30 pounds. I've gained 25 pounds since Steve and I got married so that pretty much breaks down to 5 lbs a year and now it's time to get rid of it. So like I was saying, yesterday was my first day and I already went over my points so wish me lots of luck because I think I'm gonna need it!!